Kanika Batra may have seemed like an attention seeker and a disloyal companion to some others when she said that she cheated and that she didn’t feel guilty. The former Miss World Australia 2019 finalist shares, however, that she felt no regrets for the things she did to get attention and praise them because she couldn’t feel them.
The 26-year-old influencer Kanika Batra shares that she has NPD or narcissistic personality disorder.
Speaking to SBS Insight, the model and author discuss how she mitigates the negative impact of her borderline sociopathic behaviors.
“When I get positive comments, it’s wonderful and I’m sorry, but they don’t tend to stay with me. They are very fleeting. However, if I start receiving insults, they really hurt me more than I could explain. ”
“Sometimes I have irrational reactions when I feel that the narcissistic supply is depleted; I am so used to external validation that I don’t know how to produce internal validation,” she explains.
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“I’m hot-tempered, so sometimes I burn bridges that I don’t need, and I do really reckless and impulsive things, like spending all my money.”
Batra was joined by many people who share ideas about their narcissistic behaviors. Like others in the room, Batra said that he couldn’t feel guilt or remorse for many things he did and that people usually find problematic, like cheating.
“It’s not something I was born with. It’s not something I’ve ever experienced, but I feel like that doesn’t make me a bad person. ”
Now engaged to Sam, Batra admitted that she had cheated on her previous relationships three times and that is why they all failed. But her act of betrayal did not come with guilt for her. She shared, “I just didn’t have that kind of consideration for that person because it didn’t make me feel bad seeing someone else.”
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“It didn’t make me feel guilty.”
“I didn’t come home and then I liked not sleeping at night because I had betrayed someone. It’s easy for us to turn that part off [and] compartmentalize. ”
Dr. Zhen Zhan, who treats patients with NPD, shares that narcissism is basically followed by “a feeling of grandiosity, a lack of empathy, and a need for constant admiration.”
She began seeing a psychiatrist to help her manage her disorder when she started doing extreme things and shared: “The main difference is that I now respect my partner.”
“I understand that your needs must be met as well as mine.”
“I feel satisfied with life, I feel that I am doing it adequately well, but I do not think that I experience happiness in the same way that a neurotypical would do,” shared the candidate for Miss Earth. “With all the stigma and all the hatred that’s gotten down your throat, I like to give myself a chance.”
She shared how she grew up the worst teenager and how she b*** others. And as she entered into relationships, she could seem obsessive or just dedicated to getting people’s attention.
“We really don’t know how to control ourselves that way, so all we do is message you to find out everything about you, and we want to see you all the time; that’s how we feel. What this relationship will be.”
She also had to consciously blink, as she tends to maintain prolonged eye contact that makes people uncomfortable and reflects her behavior.
